K I GET IT IM USELESS IN ALL OF YOUR LIVES AND I HURT EVERYONE EXCEPT FOR MYSELF AND I DONT SEE YOUR EFFORTS AND ONLY YALL SEE MINE OK I GET IT NOW IM DONE HERE WITH ALL THESE SHIT AND NOBODY BEING PHYSICALLY THERE FOR ME WHEN IM FALLING APART CAUSING MY INSECURITIES TO GET FROM BAD TO WORSE I ENJOY CRYING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHTS AND I ABSOLUTELY HATE MYSELF GOODNIGHT
Talk about me being self-centred and what about all of you? Talk about you guys being hurt and what about me?! I've always been asking y'all to sympathise with me and when talking to Emma I got 'scolded' for only thinking for myself again. Feels like whatever I do will never be enough. Hello you're having a hard time there and do you think I am not? Am I having it easier here? It feels like every single thing is my bloody fault and I caused everyone to be hurt. If I've to build walls instead of bridges to feel more care and concern from y'all instead of telling you guys on my own accord. Sure I will. Sad to say, you guys are the ones forcing me into this. And if I've to stop confiding in any of you so you may not feel helpless/hurt/upset, sure I will stop. That's all, I don't care if you people I'm referring to are going to read this and I know I'm sounding harsh all I know is I feel like shit and I don't really mean everything im saying here. But aiya I still wanna spill it all out moreover it's my blog, why makes you able to question me for my every word? What so you guys think of me now as? Someone making all of y'all hurt right? HAHAHA. It feels like it's 4 vs 1 all over again. More than 4 probably this time round. Say you care, but isn't there a hell lot more to that word? Dont tell me you're hurt cause I don't see your efforts cause your actions are blinding me from them. Once again if I've to build walls instead of bridges I would I would I would. When I cry/ get upset and you ask me what's wrong I'll shut up. Won't mutter a word to any of y'all I promise. What a long wordy post, above all I'm sorry for being such a failed friend. I get it. Bye crybaby97 is getting off. Oh wait not finished, I'm tired, very very tired of taking the damn initiatives every single Friday night asking if y'all want to meet the next morning, if I don't ask nobody asks. Now even better, i don't ask, only they 2 go!!! And I'll be like #foreveralone sure it doesn't hurt, huh it doesn't. SURE. Self-harming? I'm resisting it
And God I once again thank you for Jerald
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