All my regrets

Before I cry and wallow in self pity, I need to rant. I don't want to public my blog anymore, and I really absolutely hate my life these days. Yes I am grateful for this life and all but I honestly can't take certain things lying down no more. My closest friends are telling on me to each other without me knowing. Tbh I don't see how "talking it out" helped. I'm really afraid to break down in school. I don't want to. I don't want to let that bunch of... more than strangers less than best friends but yet very important people see my weakest side. So many things are happening. I need a fucking breather. Hello I have a life I have feelings. I'm self-centered? Really? Well then so are you. Why are you unhappy that now I spend more time with her? YOU were the one who told me if I didn't wanna go with y'all it's okay. And now? Are you dumb or just ignorant to MY FEELINGS? You people have each other and at that point of time, technically I only had myself. And she happened to be there so... yeah problem..? Screw this world what is everyone turning into? Monsters.